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Thread: Joke thread (Don't read if you don't like funny)

  1. #441
    LHBA Member Kola's Avatar
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    Yeah, ever since I rented the movie "V for Vendetta" there are guys in blacks suits sneaking around here. Bastages !

    And Yeah, I finally found a gal crazy enough to like me. People say we are kinda like Chip and Joanna Gaines. She's pretty and smart and I'm just a crazy fearless fool who can make stuff. Since I haven't had TV in over 20 years (never heard of their show), we watched the old episodes. I also read their book (OK, my ladyfriend read it to me), but it's quite good and they seem like good people and a good match. Two opposites.

    I'm 60 this month, two more years and I'm gonna take back the money they stole for me (called Social Security) Maybe it's time to settle down and have some kids... lol. seriously. Might even adopt.

    I be running my own home remodeling business and kicking butt. CO has a hot real estate market and newcomers from Cali and Texas have cash in hand. Yo.

    "I was in my car driving back from work. A police officer pulled me over and knocked on my window. I said, Yo bro,'One minute I'm on the phone.'" Face ? priceless.
    Last edited by Kola; 05-28-2018 at 06:39 AM.
    "If guns kill, spoons make people fat, and pencils msipell wrods."

  2. #442
    LHBA Member loghousenut's Avatar
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    My Brother is a Cop.... seems normal for me to be on the phone when He wants to chat.
    Every time I have strayed from the teachings of Skip Ellsworth it has cost me money.

  3. #443
    LHBA Member Kola's Avatar
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    LHN, every cop I see nowadays is on their phones ! while working ! Thats ok though, lol.


    Police Officer: "How high are you?"
    Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"
    Last edited by Kola; 05-28-2018 at 06:30 PM.
    "If guns kill, spoons make people fat, and pencils msipell wrods."

  4. #444
    LHBA Member
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    I had an old stoner friend that got fired for this... Customer: "Are you high?" Him: "Did you just say 'Do you want to get high?'??"

    He was higher than giraffe reproductive parts.
    Last edited by allen84; 05-28-2018 at 08:31 PM.

  5. #445
    “None of us is as smart as all of us.” ― Kenneth H. Blanchard
    Ecclesiastes 2:18-25

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